DREAM. FAITH. ACTION.: Engaged to Jesus

I was listening to the 4/6 worship again. Cried for over an hour. At first I was just drenched in His presence, then I started to pray for Cang and Joananna. (Two new family members in Christ!) After that I just stopped talking, and stilled myself in front of Him. He showed me a vision. It was so clear...

I saw a hill with one cross that's a bit far away from where I am. The cross was empty. Then I saw Jesus dying on the cross (this is not the same picture as the previous one). At first I thought that empty cross was Jesus' cross, but then later I realized... it was my cross. It was the cross that I was supposed to be crucified on because of my sins. I was not on the cross dying because Jesus took that place for me. He, the blameless and spotless lamb, became a sacrifice for MY sins and MY shame. I don't deserve this. I really don't. He didn't have to do this for me, yet He did it even before I was formed in my mother's womb. Ok, what Jesus has done was already way too much for me. However, His love didn't stop there... Then, everything became black. A very shiny and small cross appeared, and as it turned upwards, it became the glare of the diamond on a ring. It was an engagement ring. I started bawling. Jesus asked me, "Will you marry me?" What in the world... I was so speechless. It's already more than enough to die for me when He had nothing to be blamed for, and now, He is asking me, this worthless sinner, to be His bride??!! I was trembling in tears as I responded to Him, "Yes I will." Then He showed me huge piles and piles of golden treasures and jewels. By then I was already completely broken down, and I couldn't understand this love that is so great. It's humongous, enormous, and unconditional. He not only died for me, loved me for who I am, asked me to be His bride, and yet He wanted to give me all these treasures and inheritance of His kingdom. When He showed me those treasures, all I wanted was Him, that I was kind of pushing all these good stuffs away. My tears were pouring down uncontrollably. All I wanted was to get closer to Him, even though He wanted me to have all these beautiful and glamorous gifts. I prayed, "Jesus, I don't understand this crazy love from you that is so perfect and so big. But, I want to know how to love like how You loved me. Help me to love like You. Jesus, I love You. I can never say enough to thank You for all that You have done. Thank You, Jesus."

Ruth and Karen were cooking and were calling me to go eat with them. However, I wanted to stay with Jesus for bit longer... He said to me, "I will always be here. Now go, they are waiting for you." That's when I reluctantly went out of my room.

I think, that was my first time having such a deep understanding of the gospel. I thought I have experienced God's love to a pretty deep level already, but from this experience? I've not even crossed beyond the shores of the ocean. God's love is way too deep, way too high, way too big for us to fully comprehend. We are like ants feeling little splashes of the huge waves of the deep oceans of His love.

Yay, today I am engaged.
To my one and only beloved - Jesus Christ!! ^____^